Does Your Dog Have "Bad Manners?"

• Is your dog pushy, defiant or disobedient?
• Does he refuse to obey commands unless he sees a food treat?
• Does he come when called only when he has nothing better to do?
• Does he beg for food when you're eating?
• Does he nudge your hand and demand petting?

If you answered "yes" I have some good news and some bad news. The good news - you can teach your dog to be a perfect little lady or gentleman! The bad news - this behavior in pet dogs has a direct connection to the behavior of the owners. We’ve all heard the old adage, “Treat your dog like a person and he’ll treat you like a dog.” Your dog is watching you, and learning from you, all the time.

Follow these two simple rules to help your “pushy” dog learn better manners:

1. Practice “The Deference Protocol”

   • The deference protocol requires your dog to earn everything that he or she gets from you. This important training principle is often referred to by trainers as NFL (“No Free Lunch”) or NILIF (“Nothing in Life is Free”).
   • The dog must defer to you by obeying a simple “sit” command before receiving toys, treats, petting, walks, food, going outside, etc. Before you do something for them, they must do something for you. “Want a treat? Sit.” “Want to go outside? Sit.”
   • When teaching your dog to defer, your attitude must be calm. No yelling, no drama, no hitting. Your relationship with your dog must be teacher/student. You are the teacher, the dog is the student.
     

2. Ignore all demands for attention.

   • Dogs must never be permitted to demand play, petting, toys or attention. The owner should initiate all pleasurable interaction with the dog. For example, when you return home, ignore the dog for 5 minutes, then call him to you to greet him. If Fido drops a tennis ball in your lap, ignore it. A few minutes later you can go get a ball and call him to you for a fun game of fetch. But it must be your idea, not his. You start the game, and you end the game.   
   
   Rude behavior in dogs did not happen overnight, and it will not improve overnight. But any dog can learn better manners if you are patient, consistent, and follow the above two rules.
   

What is a "Submissive Grin" in Dogs?

A submissive grin is a fairly uncommon gesture made by dogs.  It can be a bit tricky to tell the difference so people often misinterpret this signal of submission (i.e. a friendly smile)  as an aggressive snarl (exactly the opposite of the dog's intent).

A submissive grin can look like an aggressive snarl, but the two gestures are completely different in both action and intent. If you're not sure that you can tell the difference, here are a few things to look for: 

• Look at the overall body language - is it loose and happy or stiff and threatening?
• Look at the eyes - are they squinty (soft and averted) or threatening (staring and dilated)?
• What's going on in the environment? Has the dog just spotted the owner bringing the leash and is happy to be going for a walk? Or is he standing over a favorite bone stiffly (guarding it)?

Here are pics of 2 dogs. The dog on the left is doing a submissive grin and the dog on the right is doing a threat display:

Dog on left is showing full teeth with his mouth pulled back into a  "smile" - ears are gently back ("bunny ears") and eyes are squinty. This is a submissive grin.

Dog on right has her whiskers forward, hard eyes with pupils dilated, furrowed brow and a strong stare. This is a threat display.

Here is a video of a dog doing a submissive grin: http://youtu.be/Aw_1V1yguvE